Find your voice
✦
Find your voice ✦
Therapy for People Pleasers & Boundary Setting
Online therapy in Minneapolis, MN
throughout the states of Minnesota & Arizona
Tired of always putting yourself last?
Maybe you’re feeling overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things you have going on because you are afraid to let anyone down by saying anything but yes. You often find yourself agreeing to things you don’t like or don’t have time for. You are constantly overthinking small details.
You may…
Feel like you can’t say no to others
Feel exhausted all the time
Feel like you’re being mean or difficult if you say no to someone
Be avoiding sharing your wants and needs with others
Feel guilt and shame when you try to put yourself first
Feel the need to always be the “dependable” one
Feel like you’re in constant fear of letting others down
You need to apologize for things, even if they aren’t your fault
You’re so tired, you’re ready to run away from everything and everyone.
More About People Pleasing
01 What is people pleasing?
A people pleaser is someone who constantly goes above and beyond to make sure others feel like their needs and wants are being met, often putting their own wants and needs last. People pleasers often look for validation from those they give everything to but only end up with crumbs. People pleasers will do anything they can to keep the peace. As a result, the people pleaser feels overwhelmed, burned out, and loses their sense of self.
02 Where does people pleasing come from?
People pleasing often stems from early experiences. Maybe you learned that love and approval were conditional, or that peace and validation depended on keeping others happy. You may have been taught to avoid conflict, to stay small, or to prioritize everyone else first.
Over time, these coping strategies become deeply ingrained. However, what once protected you may now be what’s holding you back.
03 How can therapy help?
Therapy can work to help you set healthy, balanced boundaries; where you can get. your needs and wants meet. You can lean to say no with kindness and without the guilt and shame you feel now. Build self-worth that isn’t based others opinions but is based on what you think is important. Take up the space you want to take up.
No Boundaries
Constantly worried about what others think about you
Don’t say no, even if you really want to
In constant fear of failing because you don’t want to disappoint others
Struggle with self-esteem because it’s often tied to how others feel about them
Will overshare, even with strangers
Too Many Boundaries (Walled Off)
Isolated from friends, family and anyone else
Only see the opinion they have created of themself, unwilling to listen to what others have to say about them or change their ways.
Often take advantage of others, especially those who don’t have boundaries
Detached from others/don’t emote, others feel like they are talking to a wall
Different types of boundaries
Physical Boundaries
Personal space/bubble
Privacy
physical touch (ie: hugs)
Sexual Boundaries
Giving consent
Touch
Desires
Work Boundaries
saying no to staying late or coming in early
Not taking on more than what you can handle
Taking your breaks
Emotional Boundaries
How you are willing to share
How much you are willing to listen to
Thoughts, feelings, values, truths
Therapy for people pleasers is
a place where you can practice using your voice to set your boundaries, and work through the fear that’s holding you back from being able to set those boundaries. Where you don’t have to constantly worry about being judged by what you do or what you say. You don’t have to constantly be running at a 110 percent, you can be a normal human being. You will learn to set balanced boundaries with others, which will help you get your own needs met. You can say no to other, while still being the kind, caring and loving person you are at your core. Therapy will help you remove the feeling of guilt and shame when you have to say no to someone. Imagine a life where you feel confident in yourself because you’re able to set boundaries with others, which allows you to put your needs first so you don’t feel overwhelmed anymore and you get your needs met. You’re aware of your value, which allows you to not care about what others think about you. All of this can and should be your reality because you’re worth it. It’s time to build relationships where you feel seen, heard, loved and truly whole.
Frequently Asked Questions
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